You don’t look forward to your time together. One or both of you usually cancel or make excuses, and more often than not it ends up with “let’s catch up soon” but you hardly ever do.
Time drags. When you do spend time talking or getting together you can’t wait for it to be over. When it is over you feel drained, exhausted, annoyed, angry, used, sad, confused or otherwise upset.
It feels heavily one sided. You don’t feel listened to, heard or understood by your friend anymore, or like she cares what is happening in your life. To be fair you don’t care that much about her crappy problems either!
There’s too much talk of trouble and problems. You never seem to just have fun anymore. You feel more like a therapist than a friend, often only seeking each other out in times of crisis rather than for enjoyable company.
The silences aren’t comfortable. When neither of you is in crisis, you struggle for conversation.
You don’t have much in common anymore. Maybe you were super close when you were both single, or working for the same company or living next door, but things have changed, and you actually don’t care that much.
You talk negatively about each other to your other friends, or heard that she has been talking about you.
You compete with each other and never seem genuinely happy for one another. If one of you has some happy news the other is jealous and tries to “one up” her, while you are secretly pleased at failures or misfortunes.
You don’t trust each other. You keep more secrets than you share, and there are more lies than truths between you.
A fight would be a relief, because it’s quicker, but you’re hoping for the slow fade out. That way you never have to have the awkward conversation where you state that you are officially no longer friends and avoid those triggering feelings of rejection and explaining why you don’t like each other anymore. Just because you’re not really friends doesn’t mean you want to seem unfriendly.
If your friendship is unhealthy but you don't want to let it go, just work on making your time together fun and enjoyable again. It doesn't have to be the end... unless you want it to be!
❤ Love
Your Best Friend ForNever
xx
